Hilarious story of Jim Breuer hanging out with Lars Ulrich of Metallica and the napsack. Funny James Hetfield impression too! Raw Dog Sirius Satellite Radio
Keywords: jim, breuer, lars, ulrich, metallica, sirius, satellite, radio, james, hetfield

My name is Tucker Max, and I am an asshole. I get excessively drunk at inappropriate times, disregard social norms, indulge every whim, ignore the consequences of my actions, mock idiots and posers, sleep with more women than is safe or reasonable, and just generally act like a raging dickhead. But, I do contribute to humanity in one very important way: I share my adventures with the world. --from the Introduction
Actual reader feedback:
"I find it truly appalling that there are people in the world like you. You are a disgusting, vile, repulsive, repugnant, foul creature. Because of you, I don’t believe in God anymore. No just God would allow someone like you to exist."
"I’ll stay with God as my lord, but you are my savior. I just finished reading your brilliant stories, and I laughed so hard I almost vomited. I want to bring that kind of joy to people. You’re an artist of the highest order and a true humanitarian to boot. I'm in both shock and awe at how much I want to be you."


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Growing up, my parents read a story to me every night. I all the time assumed it was the acceptable in every child's bedtime habit across the country. As a instructor with my degree in Early Childhood Education, I know the importance of reading to children. The benefits linked with a simple daily bedtime story seem endless. Fantasize my amazement when I read the statistic stating that only 39% of parents read to their children on a daily basis (Young, Davis, and Schoen, 1996).
In a word, I was flabbergasted. I've witnessed the struggling readers and the impact that has on their daily lives. When a child has difficulties reading, all things in school suffers as a result. Would something as simple as a daily ten diminutive bedtime story interaction between a parent and child forestall these kids from struggling throughout their school years? Could it precisely be that simple? I want parents to know how vital it is to read to their children everyday.
Benefits

Teaches Basic Reading and Writing Skills
When children are being read to, they are taking in so much at once. simple things experienced readers may take for granted are introduced during the first few years of life while listening to a story. Children who are well-known with books know how to hold a book and turn the pages from left to right. They know that the book has a title.
Pre-readers also understand that the book contains pictures and words and they start distinguishing words and letters. They begin to recognize that the printed text is read from right to left and top to bottom, which is directly linked to beginning writing skills. School districts expect children to be reading simple word texts by the end of kindergarten, and having these basic skills can move them toward success.
Teaches Basic Listening Skills
It's true, as I sense it in the classroom everyday. Some children don't have the potential to sit still long enough to listen to a story. It can be inherent that some children may have issue because of a disability, but others may naturally lack the insight to what story time is all about. Manufacture story time at home a daily, fun and moving performance can encourage children to get excited about story time at school which can also discourage behavior issues.
Promotes Vocabulary and Language Skills
Just think of all the new words children hear from books. Our daily conversations do not wish much use of involved language or vocabulary and can hinder the amelioration of a child's oral language. Reading to a child can introduce so many new words, especially nonfiction titles. Children's literature provides great models of language for children. In hearing the flow of the writing and the innovative words, especially in repeated readings of the same text, can look after children's language development.
Builds Knowledge of the World
As in language development, reading exposes children to worlds of new information. As a teacher, I used books to teach children about a topic, such as a place, or a person, or a topic. The amount of data a child can learn from books is never-ending, which leads into the next benefit.
Fosters a Love of Reading
Enabling children to enjoy reading is one of the most leading gifts a parent can do. Kids will learn reading skills in school, but they will come to connect reading with work, not pleasure. As a result, they may lose their desire to read, effecting their schoolwork and desire to learn. When a parent shares an moving story with a child, and in turn, gets excited with the child, the parent is showing how much fun reading can be. Jim Trelease, author of The Read-Aloud Handbook, encourages parents to lead by example by stating; "Make sure your children see you reading for pleasure other than at read-aloud time. Share with them your enthusiasm for anyone you are reading".
Encourages Parent-Child Bonding
Reading aloud also creates a extra time for parents to bond with their children. Cuddling together for a bedtime story, you'll be helping your children build a lifelong appreciation for reading. (Reading Aloud, n.d.) Builds Self-Esteem Children often want to hear the same story over and over. Just as adults may need to hear something more than once to remember or understand, children are the same way.
Trelease (2001) makes a very moving point, "Those of us who have seen a movie more than once fully realize how many subtleties escaped us the first time. Even more so with children and books". He also points out that repeated readings can turn a child into an expert on a particular book. The child feels good about himself and connects that good feeling with reading (Trelease, (2001).
The significance Of Reading To ChildrenRodney Carrington - Tips On Marriage Video Clips. Duration : 3.70 Mins.

Sharing funny Christmas quotes gives a house an opening to laugh together and feel a sense of joy, jolliness and closeness during the festive season. As an added bonus families will reap condition benefits in the process. Laughter helps to scheme your nervous system, reduce stress, boost your immune law and gives your internal organs a good work-out. Sharing funny Christmas quotes is an opening to come together sharing inspiration, joy and a few laughs. Give a gift that brings joy to the ones you love on a whole new level by sharing funny Christmas quotes.
You can add Christmas quotes to your Christmas cards to make them even more enjoyable and memorable for the recipient. You could also add them to your own home made Christmas crackers. How about being creative and paint Christmas quotes onto a Christmas bowl, pot plant, a Christmas apron or even onto Christmas cushions or throw rugs which you could also give as fun and inspirational gifts too. With a miniature imagination and creativity, ideas for sharing funny Christmas quotes and applications are endless.
So why not start a new tradition in your home and get the whole house complicated in looking on the internet or in books from the library funny Christmas quotes. You could even encourage everyone to make up their own traditional funny Christmas quote. You could enlarge an invitation to extended house and friends to bring along a funny Christmas quote to share at your Christmas get-together. You could even have a prize gift for the best funny Christmas quote. You can Google 'Funny Christmas Quotes' and you will find hundreds to pick from and why not even make up your funny Christmas quotes.

Here are seven top funny Christmas quotes to help you get started:
1. I once bought my kids a set of batteries for Christmas with a note on it saying, toys not included. Bernard Manning
2. I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mom took me to see him in a branch store and he asked for my autograph. Shirley Temple
3. The consummate Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn't for any religious reasons. They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin. Jay Leno
4. Decorate your homes with lots of mistletoe... This won't certainly help the environment... But more kissing has got to be good for world peace. GreenPeace
5. Santa Claus wears a Red Suit, He must be a communist. And a beard and long hair, Must be a pacifist. What's in that pipe that he's smoking? Arlo Guthrie
6. Christmas just like a day at the office; you do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit. Anonymous
7. In the old days, it was not called the Holiday Season; the Christians called it 'Christmas' and went to church; the Jews called it 'Hanukka' and went to synagogue; the atheists went to parties and drank. Habitancy passing each other on the street would say 'Merry Christmas!' or 'Happy Hanukka!' or (to the atheists) 'Look out for the wall! Dave Barry
Introducing some funny Christmas quotes will open the door for extra fun, laughter and holiday jolliness this Christmas festive season. So do not miss an opening to add more inspiration, fun and laughter to your celebrations. Remember that house and friends that laughs together create a greater closeness straight through inevitable shared experiences and fond memories together. Introducing funny Christmas quotes is an opening to add more joy, jolliness and depth to your family, friends and office gatherings this festive Christmas season.
Christmas - Top 7 Funny Christmas Quotes For family Fun, Laughter & Jolliness!Monty Python-The knights who say Ni!! Video Clips. Duration : 4.48 Mins.